Merry Christmas

So I got to spend the last couple of days at my Mom’s place. My sister lives there with her, along with my 5 nieces and nephews. The newest addition is Lydia, born last Friday. She is a tiny precious thing that doesn’t make much fuss about anything. Just holding her can make anyone remember the real reason for Christmas.

My brother, and friend, left early on Saturday evening because he wasn’t feeling good. Sunday morning I woke up with the beginnings of a nasty cold. Over the last couple of days it hasn’t gotten better either. So I am now doped up on a few different items which help me get through the day. Sunday was spent watching football most of the day. I did help out fixing a few things around mom’s house, but for the most part is was very relaxing. My sister, mom and I all played cards and dominos until 2 am-that brought back old memories.

This morning I woke up and had to drive down to Cincinnati to my dad’s place. The wind wasn’t as bad as yesterday but it was still pushing me all over the highway. I made it in time to watch a few “non classic” Christmas shows with my dad. You know the TBS and TNT specials that are produced by Hallmark.

We had a wonderful dinner (steak!) and then watched Wild Hogs, funny movie. It is close to 1:30 in the morning and if I make it to bed in the next 10 min this will be the earliest I went to bed since I started the trip.

Christine and I were able to talk for a while today, being gone makes me realize how much I miss her and grown to like her in the last 3 months. Looking forward to getting back home on Wed and hanging out with her.

Heading to bed now, Merry Christmas.

Christmas is a timeless story of hope

Every year at this time I prepare myself for a huge impact, 'Christmas with my family'. So this year I wondered how much of my bad attitude played into my past Christmas's and the negative experiences. So I'm changing my perspective to see if it will make a difference.
As much as I put forward with a positive foot, it seems that I get twice as much thrown back at me. Heading on the way to Christmas I find out that my brother is bringing a "friend" home with him. Which now makes 14 people in a 2 bedroom house. I think to myself "perspective", and move on. The night was alright until it got close to bed time (1:30 am) and all but 4 people wanted to head to bed. I head to bed (while the smoking and drinking continues) who knows how much sleep I might get tonight?
Tossing and turning the remaining 4 called it a night @ 4:30 am. With little sleep I am woken to the moving around of my neices at 7 am.
I am thankful for tonight, one down and 4 to go. God knows, and if I can remember throughout the week....God knows and He cares. So I head to bed knowing that Christmas IS a timeless story of Hope (our big idea for youth group on Wed), which doesn't rely on "good or bad" experiences with family.

The Dream

Remember when we were kids and we had THAT dream about what we would be when we grew up: a firefighter, a policeman or Spiderman.
Then our dreams grew, as we grew up.
A successful person, a loving father, husband, or one who gives back to the community.
As we continue to grow and live life our dreams come true. But when they do, why do we continue to make our new ones? Why are we not ever satisfied?
I am not saying that dreaming is bad or that having goals is not good, but why can we not be satisfied with what our lives are?
So many people I know are searching for "the better life" or the "new" dream. I can understand someone in poverty or someone going through something bad like a life crisis or tragedy.
But why do we do it, I mean most of us have what we need and then some. Why do we have the need to make it more? Do we have something inside of us that always makes us long for more? So many people around me are searching for "more" and not that it is bad, but it does make me wonder why?
There are many people in this world are searching for their next meal or where they will lay their head. For those of us who don't have to do that, we search for more and more. Sometimes looking past what we already have.
So is "The Dream" something we should search for and wish we had?
Or is "The Dream" something we should live every minute of the day?

Up to the test?

This morning I was put to the test.

I had the wonderful opportunity to meet 4 of Christine's close friends. The interrogation took place at 8:30 at her place with lots of coffee from Starbucks. I got to see a different side of Christine from her friend's perspective. One very funny story that includes a little"whoop whoop", some flapping your arms in the air like you are flying and a can of hairspray. O I forgot about the spider!

I am soooo tired. I think I can sleep for 12 hours if I had the chance.

This morning was a lot better than I thought it would be. Learned a lot, had a great time and I found out that I did pass the test.

How will "YOU" react?

Living here in Indy, I have grown into the Indianapolis Colts. But my heart and passion are always for the boys. I am so use to people making comments, and for the most part they have no idea what they are talking about.

Statistically speaking and the facts are the facts, Dallas is and always will be "America's Team". That doesn't mean that other teams are not great, nor does it mean that people are not die hard fans for their team-it means that there isn't many teams throughout the history of the NFL that have fans ALL OVER the Country (and world for the matter) like the Cowboys do. Look at the stands at the away games, for years they have been filled like no other away team.

Do they hold every record, no-but show me any other NFL team that hold as many as Dallas does over the test of time.

They have earned the respect they deserve.

37 vs 27 against Green Bay!

Let the excuses flow, the number one team won tonight.

Perspective

Definition of perspective=A mental view or outlook

As life gets crazy (here come the holidays) it's great when I am reminded about a HUGE life lesson I learned about Perspective.

Today is the best day to remember this as it is the 3 year anniversary of when my life lesson started, November 24, 2004. Read more about it below.......

Talking with a few friends of mine, the feeling of a "Full Schedule" (better word to use than Stress!!) is sometimes overwhelming. Why does stress impact us all, no matter who we are, how old we are, what job we have, or what our "family" looks like-it's all the same. Stress impacts us all, but the end result is different for each of us. Why is that? Why does the same "type" of stress debilitate some-but not impact others? I believe it is two fold, the perspective we have and how long we have had that perspective. There are still 24 hours in the day, no matter what perspective you have. Will you "choose" your perspective, or have it chosen for you.
I learned this after traveling to Africa and seeing family after family living in poverty, all with smiles on their faces because they had each other. Some wont live to see tomorrow, but you can't take today away from them.
So why do we allow our perspective to be chosen for us. We allow "life" to bombard us hit after hit and then wonder why at the end of the day (or week) that we feel overwhelmed.
How do we choose our own perspective? I don't have an easy answer, I wish I did. I know what I "don't" do which would help me and many others.....Offensive Scheduling-then sticking with it. Easier put....proactively schedule time doing things that refuel you-then don't allow them to be pushed aside by something else. I always like doing things for others, so even if I have something planned that would refuel me-if someone asks me to do something, I drop what I am doing to help out. You might be like that also. Even though it sounds like the right thing to do, I am realizing more and more that if I say no (or not right now) that I will be a better person to help out in the future. So when was the last time you did something that refuels you? Do you even have a list of what those things are? Start there!

1.List those things that refuel you and then list those things that drain you.

2. Schedule this week (let your week end on what ever day you want) one of those things that refuel you.

3. Continue scheduling one refueling thing every week and add another refueling thing for every draining thing you have.

Easier said than done. Let me know if it works for you, and I will do the same.

Huge Life Lesson

If this post thing works out you should have read "Perspective" before you read this one.......

This is a lot of information to help set up what I was going through before I learned my lesson



Today is the best day to remember this as it is the 3 year anniversary of when my life lesson started, November 24, 2004. Life was more than crazy running a small business and that day wasn't any different. Heading to Grace after work for the "Wed Night" program, I was ready for a break. Right after the program was over I headed home, packed up Amber and an overnight bag and headed to Ohio for Thanksgiving. Arriving at my mom's house close to 1:00 am to find everyone still awake waiting to say hello. Exhausted from my day which started by teaching a BodyPump class at 4:30 am, I was more than ready for bed. But I sleep on the couch, so I wasn't going to get any sleep until everyone was ready for bed. I asked over and over again, "when are you all going to bed" it was already 3 am. Finally close to 4 am I found myself passing out on the couch, only to be awakened to my nephew crying. He wouldn't stop and no one woke up to help him...so I did. After the third attempt to get him back to sleep it worked, now it is 6:30 am and my mom is up getting the turkey in the oven for lunch. No sleep now because everyone is getting up. We eat lunch and everyone needs to get on the road to additional holidays, so I head back to Indy to get some work done. I head to the club and watch the Cowboys win as I am doing long over due paperwork. Head home around 9pm and you would think I would just crash, but I don't and I am tossing and turning at 3am. Then the alarm goes off it is 6am and I need to get back into work. I have no idea when I finally went to bed, all I know is that I am beat. It was a LONG day but I finally got home around 7 and brought paperwork home with me. I was planning on being in bed no later than 11pm, but I finally made it up stairs closer to midnight. Still cant sleep! I look at the alarm clock it is now 4am....then 5am, then 6am. Next thing you know it is noon and I need to get things done. I drag through the day back at work. Now since I slept till noon, but sleep schedule is way out of whack. I am up until 8am on Sunday morning and fall asleep while I was trying to get ready for church, wake up at 11:00 and now I miss church. It wasn't the first time I missed church, actually I haven't been to church for 4 weeks now. Sunday doesn't get any better, I actually get zero sleep. The day goes by very slow-but I don't remember any of it. I talk to Luke Monday evening and tell him that I have had around 10 hours of sleep since Tues a week ago. My body hurts with every step I take, I actually had to get a replacement instructor because there was no way I could teach the class. I wish I could say that I got some sleep on Monday evening, but I didn't-not even an hour. I watched TV, read a book, drank a glass of milk, moved to the couch, back to my bed-nothing. It is time to go to work, so I get a LARGE glass of coffee and head in. I need to sign checks and my hand hurts trying to make my name legible. My stomach hurts like I have the flu, but I don't. My head is pounding with every heart beat. I call Luke and tell him I am stopping by after work because I don't know what else to do. The business is struggling and has been for a while, the stress has gotten to me-actually it has taken over my body and my life. 6:30 rolls around and I am heading out of the office, I call Luke and tell him I am actually feeling better and think I will be able to fall asleep. So I leave work and head home. As soon as I turn west on 96th street the pain in my head and stomach returns. What in the world is going on with me. I have no idea, so I call Luke to see if I can come over-no answer. Then call Rob and ask if I can come over to talk, he says come on by. I remember walking into his house and into his kitchen. He looks at my and asks "what is wrong with you?" and I lose it, I just breakdown. I remember that his daughter Amy is in the other room so I pull myself together and ask if we can go in the other room. After talking and praying he tells me that I am in a level of depression. That happens when any one of your tanks get low. You have a spiritual, physical and emotional tank. For me all three were very low. When one starts getting low your body will let you know....you will feel a little "stressed or overwhelmed". If you don't do anything to bring that level of that tank up or if another tank starts to get low you will hit a level of anxiety. Our body's are design to go into protect mode and they give us plenty of warning signs. The next two signs you will get you wont be able to ignore, the first is depression and the last is nervous breakdown.

So now to my lesson I learned.

Rob explained many things to me, and I was surprised to understand English after the lack of sleep that I was getting. He told me that even though we both realized where I was, things were not going to change over night. He said that I would have to proactively do things that I liked to do and be around people that refueled me. Also that I couldn't bring work home which would allow me to start to separate work from home. The part that was hard to swallow was when he said that it would take 30-60 days to see some light at the end of the tunnel. He prayed over me and I headed home with two things planned out. Movie with Rob and Susan on Friday and Jan 1st in Chicago going to see where Rob grew up. I headed home and I did feel better, but as I turned into my driveway I felt sick to my stomach. It was different this time, I knew in my head that it was alright that I felt this way. It was after 10:30 when I got home and I went directly to bed. I SLEPT LIKE A BABY. It felt like I slept for days, I did wake up at 8:00, called into work and told them I wasn't going to be there until noon. I went back to bed! I would like to tell you that everything started to work in my favor, but it didn't. It was a hard couple of days at work, but I was looking forward to the movie on Friday night. I went to youth group on Wed night and sat with my guys for the whole night. Church wasn't the only thing for the past 3-4 weeks that I missed, I also wasn't staying for the entire evening at youth. Thursday night I headed over to Luke and Jen's and Friday night was the movie. Since Tues I started sleeping more and more, getting around 8 hours each night with the help of Tylenol PM.

I changed my perspective and took control of my schedule and life. Fast forward to February and I am feeling much better. Looking back I spent time EVERY night hanging out at someones place or youth group since that Tues night at Rob's. I also took Tylenol PM since that night as well. It is the 17th and the night before we leave for the Winter Retreat. That night was planned as the night to stay home alone and to not take any Tylenol PM. I made it through the night without going anywhere, but I did take 1/2 does of the PM. It wouldn't be till April when I finally stopped taking the PM.

My perspective has changed and stayed changed since then. Every day I wake up and I choose my perspective for that day. There still is 24 hours in a day, the only difference is that I enjoy them now.

Crazy Weekend

This weekend started off with a bang, a long bang. Our small group sleep over started on Friday....12 guys + no sleep until 4am=a great, but tiring weekend. We had not one but two Wii's going on at the same time. Guitar hero 3 was playing on one and a mix of bowling and tennis on the other one. As 3 am came around we decided to watch Transformers on the big screen, which was neat even when you are tired. After trying to make Saturday productive with a 1 hour nap (that hurt, I wanted 3 hours more) I ran to the store to get things for our date night, homemade pizza + a movie. It was great to relax and chill watching an old time favorite (Best Friends Wedding, Julia Roberts). Somewhere I got addicted to Super Mario Galaxy, this will be trouble.
Rounded out the weekend with a little football. I took Luke to the Colts game for his birthday, a nail biter until the end. Then I rush home to watch the Cowboys and their close one, 9-1 not bad for America's Team.

It is late, but I wanted to re-cap this weekend before bed. Day off tomorrow and I will enjoy a little Wii and relaxation.

Through the eyes of.......

For the longest time I have been keeping this site a secret. I thought that I would write differently if I knew people could read what I wrote. Maybe I will who really knows. The more I thought about it that's really big of me if I think that this site would be something that "others" would want to read. So now it is public for my friends to see. Speaking of friends let me shed some light on one through my eyes. Maybe I can get away without him reading it.
He sees the best in others no matter who they are, I am sure he wonders what others see him as. I have known many people and I would say that he ranks at the top as someone you want to know and be around. One can only hope that being around him would rub off and make you a better person. There isn't a dull moment when he is around, not in the clowning way-but more in the always brightening the room. His heart for Christ shines brightly. It creates a sense in me that makes me want to strengthen my relationship with Christ.
Daily devotionals, prayers and time spent with God are all things we try and do to strengthen our relationship. He doesn't just try.
Daily he makes me want to be a better man, actually a better christian man. I never thought one person could have such an impact. Want to know him more just click here, or just come over to our place. He is weird, but he would attest to that!

10,000 feet or the bottom of the Ocean?

So what is your worst fear? How about your top three?

When you come up with them, what would it take to do them? My top ones are heights and closed spaces. I can climb ladders but it is taking the step- that gets me. Closed spaces they get to me when I am not in control to get out of them.
Two things that would set me over the edge are sky diving and a submarine.
I say all of this because a great friend of mine overcame a fear of his tonight. Not in a way that it isn't a fear any longer, but in a way that he faced it and won. Being in front of people is not one of his favorite things, let alone talking. So tonight he not only got in front of others and spoke but he painted-expressing his talent for all to see.
Why did he do that?
Because I asked-no, because he wanted to conquer his fear-no. He did it because of his relationship with Jesus, because of what He is doing with his heart. It has been an amazing journey to watch him grow and tonight was a sight to see. It was amazing to watch and to see the students soak it in. To watch them experience God in a new way-something that we all wont soon forget.
So after watching Pat go through this experience, I sit here tonight wondering if I would do the same. If I was called by Jesus to reach someone while sky diving, or in a bottom of the ocean-would I do it. The thought alone makes my stomach turn a little as I write it. So I am more than proud of Pat, I am in awe of him. I also know that he will be there if....actually when I need him to help me jump out of that plane.

10%

Recently a topic of conversation about accountability came up at work. We talked about not only the importance of having those in your life who will keep you accountable, but also authentic relationships with those individuals. I have three individuals who keep me accountable, and we have all talked about what it means to be authentic. Most of the time we ask the hard questions, and we get answers, but we don't go for the final 10%. I bring this up because Brandon asked me today what was the 10% I was leaving out about Christine. I told him nothing, that I told him everything. After our meeting I headed home to get ready for work. While I was in the shower I thought about the 10% question, and it finally hit me-there was 10% that I wasn't telling him.
This relationship that I am in feels so different for some reason. So for some reason it just "feels" different, like it really matters this time. All the other girls I dated obviously didn't matter: the time we talked on the phone didn't matter-we are not talking today. That first date, or that special present I purchased didn't matter, I can't even remember one of them right now. All of that time, energy and interaction added to who I am today-but while it was happening and now that it is over-it doesn't matter. For some reason I feel like this one matters, like that first date...phone calls...time spent together...it all matters. I don't want to say that I feel this is the one, but I can see spending the rest of my life with her.
So my 10% is that I am walking through something that I am really not sure about. I have no control over it, I just need to experience it-and enjoy it. That doesn't make it any easier though.

So my 10% is something that I think about 90% of the time.

Normal weekend?

This weekend has been a great one but also very crazy at the same time.
For some, weekends are a time of relaxation, I haven't figured that one out yet.
I took Friday off to prepare for a wonderful evening with Christine. We decided that I would cook for us and stay in to watch a movie. I recently purchased a pasta maker, so I made a bechamel shrimp sauce and shrimp bisque. For dessert we had a white chocolate caramel amaretto fondue. We watched Pursuit of Happiness, which even for the second time is a great movie. She is a great woman and I really enjoy spending time with her.
On Saturday we went to see the musical Bye Bye Byrdie at Heritage. Two of our guys Sash and Chris were the leads. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. It was great and many of our students were in the musical. They did a great job for a high school musical, but Sash really stood out. Even his peers were shocked by his performance. I wouldn't be surprised if acting was apart of his future. After we got back, I headed to a clients house to put in a plant in their front yard. Then I realized that I was close to HHGregg so I went to look for a TV. I have been waiting and looking weekly at TV's. 4 hours later I am at my house with a new HDTV, and I was only going to look. Cyrus and Becky helped put it together and around 10pm it was turned on for the first time. It is really sweet!

Sunday was the crazy part of the weekend. Starting off with church then heading to the shepherd team meeting. Right after the meeting we had guys from our small group over to my place for lunch and to go through a book together. Brandon and I were thinking around 5-6 guys would be interested in this, 13 showed up. Sex God, by Rob Bell is the book we are going through and it was really neat to see them open up as we discussed the topic. Right after the book study I had to run real quick, pick up Trevor and head downtown for the Colts vs Pats game. It was a great game with one series deciding the ending. All I can say is ........the pats suck! After the game I head home as fast as I can to see the Cowboys DEFEAT the eagles.
So there was a great ending to a crazy weekend!

Blogs

I started today by checking Blogs.
I haven't kept up on "others" blogs for a long time. The same amount of time since I last wrote in my blog. When talking to others about friends I always hear "I read that in _____'s blog". I feel that others using blogging in a way that I will never be able to. Pat always ask "when do I get to see your blog"? I have kept this site secret for a while, not that there is a whole lot of stuff in here to hide, I am afraid I will write differently when I "know" others are looking. So for now, it stays hidden.
After reading 6 blogs, I do think people communicate differently through the computer than they do in real life. More is revealed about how we are feeling than we would reveal in person.
So Blogs seem to be a HUGE part of communication between friends. So more and more I need to get on board with them.

Saturday, time to rest

I woke up on Saturday and headed to the store. We wanted to eat in for at least breakfast, so I went to purchase things. Prices were so crazy, $40 of groceries here cost $96 down there. The one thing I will not forget about the trip was Lucy. She was this little old lady in her 70's or 80's. I don't have a problem with the older generation working-if it is done from a social aspect, but I can't stand it when it is a necessity for them to live. So Lucy says that she is taking my groceries out to my car, I tell her that she doesn't need to do that-she responds "It's my job, I guess it is my penitence from sinning". As we head to the car she explains that she and her husband moved to Florida 15 years ago (from New York), he passed away a few years ago-but she is still stuck in Florida. She cant afford to make it back to New York. Did you know that SSN only pays you one check when someone dies, the larger check-but only one. Before I knew it I gave her money and walked back to my car. Then I heard her voice and she was walking towards me and she is crying. All I hear is God Bless you, and I think to myself 'He already has, I just saw Him in Lucy's eye's'. My heart broke for Lucy, and I still wonder whats going on with her.

There are hundreds maybe thousands who go to Orlando for Vacation. Some people are so stressed out that don't seem to be enjoying themselves. To my right is one lady know as "GD Lady" who needs to take a vacation without her children. She made her crying son go to the shallow area to swim, he of course wanted to go into the deep end. Then she has her daughter swim in the deep end. The kids are in the water less than 5 min, before she yells "GD we are out of here, I cant watch you both on opposite ends of the pool". This was not her first time saying "GD", but I got a good picture of her in her prime. There were plenty of other "stressed" parents showing their true colors, but 'GD' really stood out.

LeARninG this blogging stuff

Forgot to put some pictures on the post below so here they are.

Long time

It has been a long time since I posted anything on here. I start a lot of things, it's finishing them I have a little problem with. Another thing I haven't done in a "Long Time" is take a break, a little vacation.

This past weekend I headed down to Orlando with a few friends (Brandon and Cyrus). They really made the trip, and also made me relax and not look at emails. The place we stayed at was a nice condo on a 150 acre resort. After checking in we hit Chick-Fillet (since I don't eat there enough here at home) and headed to Magic Kingdom for the Joy Fest concert. David Crowder, Chris Tomlin and Third Day played that night with an hour break in between, which was plenty of time for us to check out the park. Cyrus has a motion sickness issue, which became more of an issue later in the trip than the first night, but it didn't become and issue with "It's a small world". I think the ride that made us all sick was something with "stitch" in it, a little nasty creature. The ride was great until this little guy eats a chili dog and burped, which they then blew something into our faces. That was enough to loose dinner, but no one did. Chris Tomlin and David Crowder were great, Third day was just alright. We got back to the condo around 1:00am after leaving Grumpy 186.

Why Hands

When I was thinking of a title, it took about 5 seconds before Hands came to mind. I sat down a little over a year ago and wanted to come up with a name for my company. Helping others and wanting to show God through my work is where I started and before I knew it His Helping Hands was born. Lending a helping hand to show Jesus to those around me.

Now onto the purpose of this Blog....

I just got back from our Mississippi Mission Trip this past Saturday. It was a neat experience with a lot of stress. 25 students and 11 adults traveled down to Canton, MS to experience the south along the lines of racial reconciliation. While we were down there we ran an outdoor VBS and a work crew replaced the roof on Ms. Jackson's house. Out of all the years that I have been to this area for mission trips, this roof has been the worse one I have seen. Normal roofs up here are 16" on center with 5/8 or 3/4" plywood. Every house I have worked on down there are 24" on center with 3/8" plywood. Another way to put it, watch where you step if not you could be sitting on the couch next to the homeowner. But Ms. Jackson's house had no plywood, rather she had 1 x6 pieces of wood. So there were gaps between each board, rotted pieces and even pieces that were never there. Ms. Jackson was probably in her late 50's or early 60's and was paralyzed from the waist down so she was bed ridden. This made the situation even worse as the roof leaked and came through the ceiling on top of her. The work crew was by far one of the best we had. The other adults might not have had the experience before they arrived, but they all picked it up quickly. The students also did an amazing job and we did get the roof finished. On the last day in Canton, the entire team goes around to all the homes that we worked on singing and praying for the homeowner. We also leave a small planter of flowers. Have you ever had those moments that are so clear to you that you feel Jesus in the same room with you. The team experienced that with Ms. Jackson, her response to the work we did, the singing and praying for her along with the planter of flowers. That moment was one that we all will never forget.

As I think back to the stress of the trip, I also remember that moment and it makes it all worth it.

This will either be my only post, or just the beginning

It seems that everyone has a blog, so I thought that it's time for me to start one. I joined facebook.com back in December 2006-so now on with this piece of technology.

This really isn't my first Blog that I created, just the first one for me! Debbie Shaffer, an adult leader for Senior High, came to me asking for help in creating one after she was diagnosed with Cancer. She felt this would be a great way to keep in touch with those who wanted updates on where she was with her fight. A quick update with that, she is winning the fight against cancer. She just joined us down in Mississippi this past week with our mission trip.

I have been wanting to start a Blog for a while now, so like the title says if it is my only post then I am done. Since I don't want it to be done.............I need to add a second post.